I turned 39 on the weekend. It was a very low-key day. A couple of people, many laughs and many foods. Its not the big one…yet. Actually, one friend said my age should be 39 – 2 (‘the last couple years shouldn’t count’).
Even though it was a joke, it really does feel like we did a fast-forward from March 2020 until now. I have an app on my phone that creates daily image slideshow memories of my picture folder. It shows the date, time and even adds the Ken Burns’ effect with some cheesy music. I have trouble remembering taking any pictures before 2019. Depending on your age, geographical location, immune system, medical history, primary source of news, these past few years has had a unique impact.
The only constant that I find is either a heavy dose of cynicism, impending dread or a bleak outlook on the future. These past couple of years have been rough. I can hear it in peoples voices and literally see it in people’s eyes. Nobody was spared. We were all subjected to it. We were witness and victim to it.
I don’t really do resolutions at New Years. I look back on my birthday. This past year? Maaaaan! Been through some things, imposed and self-imposed. Some that’ll stay with me until I hit the grave. Learning never stops.
A close friend of mine asked me what my prayer was for my last year as a ‘late-30’. Then a chorus came to mind:
Keep My Spirit Alive/More than anything/You can take it all but the Lord on my side/Spirit won’t die
Keep My Spirit Alive, Kanye West feat. westside gunn & conway the machine, 2021.
That’s what I want. No matter what comes, that my spirit would remain above.
